Remember the Great Goldfish Disaster of 2020, when we discovered that my pond was essentially a cauldron of death? Well, I’ve decided to have a second go at it—only this time I’ve done more homework.

Why do fish die? Maybe low oxygen levels in the water—add an aerator . . .

Why else? Unhealthy levels of nitrite, nitrat, ammonia, and acidity—test the water chemistry and adjust if needed . . .

Turns out I was slightly too alkaline, but everything else was spot on. So I mixed in a few drops of a potion to bring the pH down and tested again—this time with good results.

I couldn’t think of anything else, so back to the pet store. Only this time instead of getting the expensive big pond goldfish, I got the ones that only cost 30 cents apiece.

I let them float in the bag for a while to equalise the water temperature and then set them free.

It has been 10 minutes since then and so far no sudden deaths… so this might just work. Fingers crossed!